So, it’s been two weeks since I went through a grueling barrage of heart tests to try and determine why there’s been a decline in my ejection fraction and what the next course of action will be. And, much to my dismay, I know as much now as I did going into those tests. Meaning I still don’t know. Meaning I’m still waiting for test results. And the waiting is driving me insane. I need answers. And I need them NOW!
I called the doctor’s office on Friday and left a message for them to call me back. I didn’t receive that call back. I attempted to call again today and, again, got no where. So, I’m going to give it another try in the morning. And if I’m not successful this time, I’m simply going to get in my car, drive across town to the office, and demand answers in person. I need to know what’s going on. I need to know what we are going to do next. Am I going to need surgery to implant a defibrillator in my chest? I need answers. And I need them NOW!
I’m trying to keep living my life while I wait, but this big dark cloud is looming overhead. I’m trying to think positively about things and believe that everything will be OK. But the negative thoughts in my mind are outweighing the positive at this point. Every aspect of my life going forward is tied to this one thing. I can’t really plan to do anything because I don’t know what’s going to happen with my heart. I am in limbo. And it sucks.
In the mean time, I’m stuck wearing this heart monitor that has become increasingly annoying in the past few days. Apparently, I’ve had an allergic reaction to the adhesive and/or conductive gel on the electrodes, because there are big red welts on my chest where the electrodes were placed. They hurt and itch like crazy, too. Just lovely. And I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had these blasted things rip off in the middle of the night. Great way to wake up, let me tell you. I sincerely hope it’s all worth it in the long run. I guess time will tell.
For now, I need answers. And I’m going to get them!