I Want a Heart & Pancreas for Christmas

So I was driving around town today in the rental car I have while my car is in the shop, and the song “I want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” came on the radio.  And given my knack for parodies, I couldn’t help but play with the words.  And so, I came up with the following little diddy.  Enjoy!

I Want A Heart and Pancreas for Christmas

I want a heart and pancreas for Christmas
Only a heart and pancreas will do
Don’t want a pill, to make me a happy boy
I want a heart and pancreas that’ll work and not annoy.

I want a heart and pancreas for Christmas
I don’t think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won’t have to use our dirty chimney flue
Just bring them through the front door,
that’s the easy thing to do

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see an organ toting hero standing there

I want a heart and pancreas for Christmas
Only a heart and pancreas will do
No blood pressure cuffs, no glucometeruses
I only like hearts and pancreases
And hearts and pancreases like me too

Mom says the organs could pep me up, but then
Doctor could say rejection and I’d be screwed again.

(Short Music Interlude)

There’s lots of room for them in my chest and abdomen
I’d give up anything if they’d work properly again.

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see an organ toting hero standing there

I want a heart and pancreas for Christmas
Only a heart and pancreas will do
No blood pressure cuffs, no glucometeruses
I only like hearts and pancreases
And hearts and pancreases like me too