“The true test of character is not how much we know how to do, but how we behave when we don’t know what to do.” – John W. Holt, Jr.
Paralyzing. That’s what the fear that consumed me was after hearing that I had both type 2 diabetes and congestive heart failure.
I remember the heavy numbness coating me as I sat on the table, listening to the doctor’s words. I remember the doctor leaving the room, and me slumping over with my head in my hands and not knowing what to think, or say, or do. I remember April being there with me, trying to offer what comfort she could.
I didn’t have a clue what I was going to do. How was I going to juggle two diagnoses at once? Had I caught the CHF in time to do something about it? or should I just kiss my rear goodbye? In my mind, I knew that I could live with the diabetes, but not if my heart gave out completely.
Honestly, there was no way that I could give equal attention to the two diagnoses. My heart became my top priority; as I said, if it quit working all together, there wouldn’t be any living with diabetes. I also knew that the diabetes had to be managed, too, so I essentially took a crash course in diabetes management. I went to diabetes education classes to learn the basics and get help with developing a meal plan. I took that knowledge back to my little world, put it to work, and just kind of fell into a routine. One that has more than paid off in the long run. 🙂
Living with type 2 diabetes and congestive heart failure has been, and continues to be, a true test of character. And while it is quite difficult some days, I am thankful for this test. It has shown just how heavy a burden I’m able to bear.